05 Jan Setting Goals: 5 Reasons Why You Fail and How to Master Them
Last week, we created a goal setting worksheet for you to use this year. If you have even read even one article about setting goals you will understand the principles of S.M.A.R.T goals. Specific, measurable, action oriented, realistic, and timely.
With all the overwhelming data pointing to the value of setting goals, why don’t you? These are the 5 reasons you don’t set goals and how to master it.
Setting clear goals makes you actually have to commit.
This is a form of fear. Fear that we won’t succeed. Fear that we will play big.
This is the number one reason people don’t actually set “smart goals.” Once you paint a clear picture of what your goals are, with an action plan to achieve it—you have added pressure to achieve it. Honestly, it is scary playing big.
It’s easier to never set the goals, and therefore never have the pressure to achieve the goals.
Playing small is an evolutionary trait. It is caused by our reptilian brain (the oldest and strongest part of our brain). The reptilian brain’s sole purpose is to keep us safe. It makes us scared and tells us to hide in our caves. It’s the voice that tells you everything can go wrong.
But playing small will never allow us to achieve anything good in life. Everything that is worth achieving takes hustle.
How do we master this?
Simple, we must find the gift in the pain of failure. We must become comfortable with fear and embrace it.
Understand that an event, like achieving a goal isn’t inherently good or bad. It is how it makes us feel about a situation. We like completing goals because they make us feel good, we don’t like failing at goals because they make us feel… not good!
Failing at goals can be pleasurable if we associate our failings to a positive event. For instance, I failed at getting a job with a company I really wanted. But I am proud of this event because I gave it my all. I pursued this job and didn’t give up until it was 300% clear that I couldn’t get it.
I kept coming back with new ways to get the job. Inevitably I failed to acquire the job, but it felt great giving it my all.
Setting goals and achieving them are a lot of work.
Let’s not joke around. To achieve anything in life is a lot of work. Nothing in the world comes easy. Achieving your goals and desires takes dedication and sacrifice. At the end of the day when you come home, the last thing you want to do is push yourself harder. It is much more relaxing to binge watch Netflix.
But, if you actually want to achieve your goals you have to dedicate a lot of mental, physical, and emotions resources to achieve them. This is why in our goal setting worksheet we ask you to figure out your why.
Why is THIS GOAL so important? Why will you give up those old habits for a new one?
You must answer this question to really anchor in and achieve what you’re seeking. If you don’t know why you’re doing it, or it’s for a weak reason—you’ll naturally let it go when you face a challenge. Knowing why you do something helps you when you hit walls, fear barriers, and challenges.
You’ve never completed a goal before.
Let’s not beat around the bush, only a small percentage of people actually set and achieve goals. Most people have never done this. Setting goals that work for you is like working out. It is a muscle that needs to be built up over time.
You wouldn’t start the year off going to a strong man competition if you have never worked out a day in your life.
Start by setting small goals and build up over time. This builds confidence in yourself.
For instance, in our goal setting worksheet, we have daily, weekly, and monthly goals. Set a goal every day when you wake up and do that goal first before any other priorities.
Over time, as you complete more goals they build on top of each other. This builds into a big goal over time. Actor Will Smith eloquently describes it with a story of how to build a wall.
Big goals are very challenging
Building a 16-foot wall is hard. It takes a year and a half of work to create a structure like that. The simple truth is that any wall you want to create, be it an actual wall or a big goal isn’t accomplished overnight.
The key is to break it down to a single actionable step that you can do every day. Then do it.
Big goals take an unrelenting mindset. A mindset that won’t quit no matter what. There is no shortcut to achieving anything in life. So really the only way to master achieving big goals is to start today and not stop.
Looking to up your game this year? Grab this free Goal Setting Workbook for Epic Entrepreneurs, here.
Do you have what it takes, are you a winner or a quitter? That really depends on you and if you have the right mindset in life.